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The current world record (11 minutes, 42 seconds) for the "Academic Probation" ending involves skipping all classes, living off energy drinks from the vending machine, and challenging the Dean to a fistfight. The speedrun community is currently split on whether the "Vending Machine God" random blessing is RNG-dependent or frame-perfect.

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Skip your first class. Use the time to steal the Financial Aid office key from the secretary's desk. (Sneak skill check: Medium). This allows you to take out infinite loans without approval. The current world record (11 minutes, 42 seconds)